Approximately a 4-minute read

Hello!

This past week, a common topic among my clients has been dealing with adversity. Here are some of the things we've been discussing.

-Justin

When Adversity Strikes

Adversity doesn’t quietly enter into your life—it crashes through the door, uninvited, and shatters everything you thought you could count on. One moment, you’re certain of who you are and where you’re headed. Next, your confidence is in pieces, and the ground feels like it’s dropped out beneath you. What you do in that moment defines everything that follows.

I’ve seen adversity lay waste to even the strongest. Professional athletes who seemed invincible suddenly question their competence after a single loss. Top-tier coaches, once surrounded by cheers, find themselves isolated under the glare of scrutiny and blame. I’ve watched as the agony of losing seeps into families, turning pride into shame and connection into isolation. Marriages fray, sleep vanishes, and the very core of a person’s identity can seem to dissolve overnight. In sport—and in life—the devastation of loss is real, heavy, and often suffered in silence because no one wants to admit how much it hurts.

But I’ve also witnessed resilience shine in the darkest moments. There are competitors who—bloodied by disappointment—refuse to surrender to despair. Teams that draw closer together, forging bonds of trust and loyalty that only true hardship can create. Athletes who seize their lowest points as a launching pad for growth, letting setbacks fuel a relentless drive to improve. Leaders who hold steady in the storm, radiating calm and purpose when the world expects collapse. The rarest individuals, no matter how fierce the adversity, remain true to their character—choosing hope, grit, and leadership as their response to chaos.

What separates those who collapse from those who rise isn’t fate, genetics, or even circumstance. It’s a choice—an invisible line drawn in the sand: Will you let adversity write your story, or will you pick up the pen and write your own?

These stories aren’t limited to stadiums and locker rooms—they play out in boardrooms, classrooms, and living rooms everywhere. Adversity is universal: a bad day at work, a ruptured relationship, a loss you never saw coming. Too often, a single setback becomes the lens through which we view our entire lives. One failure at work mutates into “I’m a failure as a person.” One argument at home feels like the end of love. But pain doesn’t have to claim the whole story. You can break the cycle, refuse the false narrative, and choose what comes next.

The Blueprint for Navigating Adversity

1. Connect to Your Go-To People

First, acknowledge how you feel. This isn’t about forcing positivity or denying pain. It’s natural to feel sad, angry, or disappointed—honor those emotions and give yourself permission to feel them. That honesty is the foundation of resilience.

But you don’t have to move forward alone. Your go-to people—your true support system—are those who care about you as a person, not just for your achievements or status. Adversity is lighter when it’s shared.

Research shows that people with strong social support recover faster from adversity and are less likely to suffer long-term damage from isolation. When you’re struggling, these relationships are your lifeline. Don’t wait until the storm is over—reach out and let your people help you find your footing again.

2. Stick To Your Go-To Behaviors

When adversity threatens to pull you under, your go-to behaviors become a lifeline. These are the actions you can control, even in chaos. For some, it’s eating healthy; for others, reading, working out, or meditation. These routines aren’t just hobbies—they’re anchors that keep you steady when everything else feels uncertain. Identify what restores you or helps you feel like yourself, even if only briefly, and make these habits non-negotiable.

3. Reflect on Past Resilience

Remember the times you’ve faced down hardship before. What did you learn? What strengths did you discover? You have a track record of making it through tough times—draw strength from that history now.

If you value faith, lean into it. If humor or kindness is your strength, use it to navigate adversity. If you love learning, seek lessons in your current challenge. You’ve survived every difficult day so far—and that’s proof of your resilience.

4. Take Control

Shift your mindset: Instead of asking, “Why is this happening to me?” ask, “What can I do about it?”

This simple shift turns you from a passive victim into an active agent. Psychologists call it locus of control: the difference between believing events control you and believing you have the power to respond. Moving from helplessness to action changes everything—it’s the difference between barely staying afloat and swimming toward the shore.

You can’t control what has happened, but you can always choose your next step. That’s where your power lives.

5. Change Your Perspective

Adversity can color every part of your life if you let it. Pause and ask yourself: What are you grateful for right now? Remember, you are more than your job, your losses, or this difficult moment.

Shift your perspective. This process—cognitive reappraisal—means reinterpreting what’s happening. It’s not about denying pain; it’s about refusing to let one moment define your entire story.

Ask yourself: What story do I want to tell myself about this moment? If my best friend faced this challenge, what advice would I offer them? Give yourself the same compassion and wisdom.

Moving Forward Through Adversity

The best athletes in the world aren’t immune to pain or disappointment—they feel it, too. What sets them apart is that they know adversity is temporary, and so is success. Neither one defines your worth; what matters is how you respond.

If you’re struggling now, remember: you already have the resources you need—your support system, your go-to behaviors, your values, and your ability to choose your response. Use them to move through the challenge. Life keeps moving, and so can you.

Two final things:

1. We work with some of the best sports organizations in the world, and are slowly growing our youth sports and executive coaching arm. If you're the parent of a committed youth athlete or an executive interested in working with one of our Process or Executive Coaches, reply to this email, and I'll send you more information.
2. For all of my daily content, you can join me on Instagram: @justinsua​

​​Hope you have a great week!

Justin Su'a

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